About Me

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Lyndonville, Vermont, United States
Hi there and welcome to my blog. I am a married 60 year old woman who still has the mind of a twenty year old. I have three children and two grandsons. I've been to hell and back each time stronger than the time before. If I can help you then it was all worth it.

Saturday, August 31, 2019

Junkie Is Such A Horrid Name #SayNoToDrugs#SayNoToDomesticAbuse

This part of my life I'm not proud of. My little girl was one year old. My mother since I had moved into my little apartment would come to pick her up Friday morning bringing her back on Monday. That way I could do anything I wanted as far as free time for myself. This was in Palm Springs, California. I had broken up with my liar of a husband for the last time. I had made friends with the young girls that had moved in next store. Also with a Mexican woman who lived in the front apartment. We had all gone to Desert Hot Springs looking to cool off. It was summer with high degrees in the hundreds. In D.H.S. there were hot springs, hence the name, water would melt coming down from the snow-topped mountain that surrounded Palm Springs. You could also take the Palm Springs Tram to the top of San Jacinto Peak. You'd take the tram up the mountain admiring the view to the top of the mountain where there was a lounge with a survivor shop. When you stepped outside it was like being in a whole new world with cold running streams and snowcaps everywhere. You would have to bring a coat. I loved it. We spent the whole day.


Choose the right way.
I had a very sheltered childhood as far as normal growing up experiences went. Sure I knew how to survive and how to work hard. But people I always saw the best of no matter who they were or where they came from. Plus I was a mother hen. One day I heard a knock at my door. It was those girls that lived next store to me. They had come over to see if I could help patch him up. Someone had clobbered him on the top of his head, blood was everywhere. They told me he had been in a fight. *There was my first red flag. Been in a fight bad enough to take a blow to the head which was bleeding.



For some reason, I was attracted to him. Enough to take him to my bed. After that, he didn't leave I was okay with that. #Red flag #2. He introduced to me to Crystal Meth much like a pedophile introduces himself to a child. I was used to taking Black Beauties as a diet supplement, this was the same thing...I thought. My child was gone over the weekend what harm could it do.

 


 As time went by I grew more addicted. I was losing weight. I only did the drug over the weekend. Red Flag #3 no it's not okay when your kids not in the house. But this was my world now. Everything was about that Cyrstal Meth. The guy who was now very comfortable with living with me would shoot up. First, he did it in the bathroom away from me so I couldn't see. After a few times of this, I grew curious. I wanted to know what it felt like. So one day with me looking away he shot me up. The rush was an unbelievable feeling only problem now you wanted that feeling all the time. 



I look back now talking to my husband I could have been an undercover cop. The people who do this drug are just like you and me. Except for their arms. Usually, even if its summertime if you see a person wearing long sleeves maybe he or she does drugs. The dealer and his wife I got to know well. We became friends. You would walk in the front door to the living room where would be two or three people sitting around dozing. 



A year and a half it took I finally got clean. I'm thinking the biggest reason was moving out of state. Those drug addicts don't like to see you get clean. I have been clean for 40 years. I did it myself. As the effects were getting out of my system I would either have my heart beating a mile a minute or I would shiver and shake like I had the flue. It was no fun. I was given this by a woman who used to be addicted to Heroin. Now there's a bad bad drug. She finally got clean thankfully raising her two children and her with her partner. Here is the link where I posted it on another page.


If you find out you're in an impossible situation here are someplace you can call. I myself went to a shelter for a month.



Call this number for help
Hazelden Betty Ford 1-844-560-2507

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